Say Cheesee..

To my darling dearest,

This is the 2nd birthday we’ve celebrated together, 2nd of many more to come. I’m glad you’ve enjoyed the night out with our friends, and I’m sorry I didn’t make your specail day any more special. It’s been such a hectic night the night before, us getting home at 3am in the morning. I thought you weren’t really up for going out, so I skipped the whole day today, just spending time at home.. My xbox is really making you a homey person, eh? ahah

Well my darling, I would like to wish you every happiness, good health and prosperity (lame I know, but it’s really the best greetings around!). I wish that we could accomplish more as a couple, as a team. I love you, and every time I see you, I want to tell you that.

Like I’ve told you previously, please have patience, towards me, towards yourself, towards all others, as I anticipate a lot of waiting.

Love you lots! Seriously. =)

- Girl

Muakz to my ling.. poor ling still working n it’s almost midnight now.

WE’RE ENGAGED!! oh i just want to tell everyone i know that i’m so happy being with you.

thank you darling, for the ring, for the proposal.. for all that you’ve given me, for all that you are to me, and for all that we’ll have in our future together..

i want to let you know that you really mean a lot to me. and i will do whatever it takes to be the best wife i can to you.

love you, now and forever.. =)

-Girl

Lately i’ve been very moody at work.So moody that i was whining about everything yet not talking to many about it.I haven’t even felt like talking to my colleagues or joke with them despite their constant hoo-hahs around the office n wherever they went.

I was unsatisfied with my working conditions,my pay,my benefits,n how i was treated at work.Basically everything there was to complain.

My smarter other-half (as he would claim =p) had told me straight to my face that i’m experiencing pms,that my mood swings sort of always happen before my red blahs start to come down like the Niagra Falls.Okay i’m exaggerating,they’re not so scary.Anyway,today i found out that my darling may be right after all,coz my mood turned slightly better today,n today is the first day of my period..

I had a thought today,was looking at my ever growing tummy..”What if i was pregnant instead of getting fat?” “If i were,when did that happen?!” “What would i do?” At least a dozen questions popped out of my head until i had to come back to reality n get back to work.It was crazy..

Back to pms,i’ve always thought i was a high EQ person,perhaps i’m just self-proclaiming it.Do people with high EQ have pms?I thk my darling just turns cold towards me when he’s unwell or when he’s tired..Does that literally mean that he has pms too??

Haha..i just love him so much,i mean.. i llove u darling.. *wink* please don’t treat me cold when u’re sick or tired,i get sad like that.i dunno whether to continue to be chirpy n silly or to be solemn n serious..

Okay,it’s getting late.Chizziechick with her period here is getting hungry n will try to sleep now..i hope u get better soon enough darling..i just realised i forgot that u needed to get more water..sorry.. =(

Hope your water is enough to at least last u til tmr.Good night my baby..love u so much..

-Girl

I know my darling is a big fan of MJ, i just somehow couldn’t see the significance of the King of Pop. To me, this is yet another entertainer, nothing more real than the next flash in the pan 50cent or Usher. My darling was glued to the box the whole nite watching MJ’s memorial which i found kinda dry and boring…i just couldn’t find the respect or appreciation for something so….make believe…so…entertainment?
I guess i was wrong…
Did my googling and youtubing of MJ, and boy was i surprised..of the great things and entertaining acts of MJ.
Videos of his moves are simply astonishing…

One thing i’ve learnt today – if i do not know how to appreciate someone/something, it doesn’t mean that the someone or something is not worth respecting, it could be just due to my ignorance and arrogance that i do not see all the greatness there is in that someone/something…

For my darling, yet another lesson in life i’ve learnt with you – altho it’s wifout you knowing… =)

and for MJ, may you rest in peace, King of Pop.

My darling had left for her job assignment at another state for the next four days, so i’ve resorted to a very unfamiliar mean of entertaining myself -> blogging……………and also some left-handed excersice =P

Anyhoo….one can never be too creative when it comes to blog entry…so…TA-DAA….here it is, my most creative blog entry to-date, a blog entry of what i’ve done for today! =P

0800	:	woke up suddenly and realised that my darling will be driving down south this morning. lazily moved my butt outta bed to look for my phone n text her..i love u darling
0805	:	*fell asleep*
0930	:	woke up with the usual morning syndrome when my alarm went off , decided that i’m still early today. With my darling in mind, Mr Leftie answered his true calling >:)
0950	:	DONE! =) went shower and get ready to work
1010	:	WORK
1210	:	MORE work
1330	:	LUNCH TIME. had lunch with 2 other colleagues. More talk bout the impending headcount reduction. DEPRESSING
1400	:	drove out to customer’s place for a meeting
1500	:	in meeting, customer is going round and round, digging out his old glory days story as an engineer and how we all should be like him
1410	:	was spacing out and thinking of my darling when my colleague knocked my hand and showed me a note – don’t you think Mr Customer looks like a cucumber? L.O.L
1700	:	glimpse of hope, the meeting is finally winding down.
1705	:	got a call from office, i’m required back in the office for a discussion bout another project.
1720	:	was driving back to office when it started to pour heavily out of a sudden. was thinking to myself, this is the perfect weather to spend some time with my darling in my room..if only she were here..
2000	:	meeting ended, was texting my darling in between the meeting, was reminded to eat healthily
2030	:	home after a cheap yet satisfying dinner.decided to blog
2045	:	realised that i need to look up some html tag in order to make the blog appears the way i wanted it to be
2050	:	found a piece of code somewhere, tried it out. Messed up my layout – *FRUST*
2100	:	tried another code, very close to what i wanted it to be, a lil more modification
2130	:	finally get what i wanted for the layout…n now for the content…i’ve totally forgotten bout what i wanted to write – *FRUST*
2145	:	enough of FRUST, went ahead with some FRUST release exercise, credit to Mr Leftie yet again
2200	:	back in the mood to blog, recalling what i’ve done for the day
2245	:	it was a long day, but i think i’ve managed to reproduce 70% of the content, time to publish this =)
NOW	:	MISSING MY DARLING

Here i am lying beside my darling in her living room while she’s deep asleep beside me.this is not the first time i’d stayed over at your place but somehow tonight am having problem sleeping.maybe it’s e fact that we just had a failed session just now,or maybe it’s just me too excited bout google map.whatever reason it is,i am wide awake now blogging on my phone.it’s has been a long while since i’ve last posted anything,i guess i’m guilty of not trying to put any effort in our blog.this is meant to be our archive of live together.

We’ve gone through a lot over the months,lotsa ups and lotsa downs, and we are doing well surviving so far.I’ve gotten to know you better and you,the same of me.There are times when i’m in doubt,i don’t deny it, i do wonder if we’ll pull it through together but it’s times like this,having you sleeping peacefully beside me that makes me want to be by your side forever.
It’s must hae been tough for you puttng up with my erratic mood over the months, i can assure you i do not mean to hurt you,it’s just that i feel for you deeply therefore when things go wrong i sorta ‘explode’ in a major way. Sorry darling, for all the heartache and headache.
I just want you to know that i love you deeply. Here’s the smiley for the day and also for the many more monts and years to come
=)

For the lack of better words, this is how i feel about us now..

- boy

I guess the 2 phrases above don’t really go well together.

I know how you’ve been going thru the downs in your life lately – my busy-ness and the lack of time spent together are wearing you thin. After reading your previous post, i told myself that i have to buck up and give you the best i could – for you’ve been suffering alone all this while.

I told myself, for this year’s birthday, you will not be crying – because you have me..and our close bunch of friends to celebrate it with you. I really thought i could make you happy…

To me, it is a cardinal sin to make someone cries at his/her birthday – tears of joy is of course, a different scenario altogether. Today, tonight…i’ve commited that sin.

I’m truly sorry darling
- i’m sorry for lashing out at you when it’s clearly not your fault
- i’m sorry for being so selfish
- i’m sorry for being so childish in front of all your friends
- i’m sorry for making you cry…on your birthday

I do not know why i snapped just now. I just had enough of waiting i guess. I felt as if i’ve been treated as a fool.

Even after all my inconsidete actions, you, my darling, did not utter even a single word of dislike at me. You took it all upon yourself for causing my outburst.

Darling, what you said to me in the car, and how you still hold my hand after all i’ve done…make me realise that to love someone, is more than just wanting to care for that someone, you have to be able to accept and forgive all the shortcomings that are an integral part of that particular someone.

You, my darling, you’ve shown me that…
It’s up to me now, to do my part…

Happy Birthday, my beloved darling…

Current Count 118:118

- Repenting Boy

We’ve been busy.. so busy that it’s getting so hard for us to spend time together.. alot of times it’s back to spending time online.. or texting each other.. I really miss you..

Today you were a no-show.. the concert was enjoyable. would definitely be better if you were around.. Am feelin blue-ish.. somehow knew you weren’t gonna make it in time for dinner and concert. i know u’re busy.. i know everyone’s really concerned about the deal.. but somehow not making time for even take-away dinner is unacceptable.. but that’s just me..

Somehow i have a feeling that you’d still have to work this weekend.. it jz reminds me of how i hate birthdays.. my birthdays to be exact.. i don’t expect this year to be any different from the last.. happy as i am with you, my dark moodswings do not go away. perhaps they do appear less often, but the effect is dire nonetheless..

My concerns you ask me.. let me share some..

1. you still have her stuffs in your room.. deadline is this weekend.. today is thursday..

2. u still have her messages in your phone.. and you told me you didn’t.. perhaps you forgot.. i don’t know..

3. the whole “we don’t have much money to stay somewhere nice” is really depressing..

4. “if we go on a holiday we’d have to delay getting a house” statements are made clear.. loud and clear. but we also need a break.

5. my parents don’t like the idea of me going over to your hometown to see your parents.. they think it’s not the custom, it’s not nice and they don’t like it.

6. i can’t think of number 6 right now, but it’s there somewhere..

7. i don’t know how many are there, but it’ll be there..

8. my ballooning figure is making me feel sad about myself.. i hate self-pity.. i feel fat and ugly.. and hungry.. all the time..

i can go on and on.. but i think 8 is enough for now. i should sleep. i still need to go to work tomorrow.. i hope my outstation work tmr is enjoyable.

good night darling.. i do love you..

Current count 115:115

-Girl